I am observing National Take a hike day on November 17, as the most celebrated day of the year.
In fact I have been counting down the days until this fabulous day arrived, when at long last I have permission to delete contacts, with non compliance to Politically correct Protocol.
Listing my “friends” I have patiently waited until today to set the record straight. Prepared texts from months prior, explaining why I have chosen them to Take a Hike.
Practicing my new mantra, which I personally originated, I heralded out in the airways-
Nada caca: No more BS, cut the crap, enough is enough, I’m done drinking the Koolaid, You've out used your second chances, and I’m moving on
Even shouting out Nada Caca feels good to the soul and freeing to the mind.
Take a Hike List
To all the moochy friends that are really friends with your wallet,
Take a Hike!
To all your needy friends that need you until you need them.
Take a Hike!
To all your draining friends that make you want to rush to the nearest Starbucks for a double espresso.
Take a Hike!
To all your crazy making friends that make you want to drink.
Take a Hike!
To all your dating friends that only take you to Half Price Happy Hours.
Take a Hike!
To all the intellectual friends that always have to be right rather than just relax and be wrong
Take a Hike!
To all the glamorous girlfriends that can’t just have an ugly girl day off and hang
Take a Hike!
To all the guys that offer you to split the tab on the first date
Take a Hike!
To all the self-absorbed friends that spend more time on their personal photoshoot sessions while they're with you
Take a Hike!
To all the super skinny friends that just make you look fat when they're around
Take a Hike!
To all the superficial friends who can't take you at your worst, and make it better.
Take a Hike!
To all the friends who don’t share every beauty secret, diet trick, or sale going on.
Take a Hike!
To all the dog friends that act like their dog didn’t pee-pee on your new rug.
Take a Hike!
To all the guys that don't realize you're the best thing that ever happened to them
Take a Hike!
To all the confused friends that forgive you when it was their fault.
Take a Hike!
To all these friends, I say take a hike!
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